You Get What You Focus On.

Question Your Thoughts to Guide Your Life.

Mary Clymer
6 min readNov 10, 2020

A decade ago I opened an artist gallery in my hometown. It was rewarding beyond anything I could measure at the time.

All I knew then was that I loved going to work, I was having fun, and meeting amazing artists all the time.

What I didn’t realize was that I was also becoming a voice for art in the community. I was making a difference in the city I cared about. And I was enjoying being able to help bring something unique home with me, my creativity.

Although a completely rewarding experience, it ended up not being a financially rewarding experience.

This ended up being my downfall. I let things slide, I started focusing more on the money than on what I was gaining. And my fear of lack started pouring out into other areas of my life.

Before I knew it I was making the tough decision to close after only 5 years. My self-confidence plummeted and felt like a complete failure.

It was awful.

My focus had turned towards expecting the universe to say “okay if lack is what you want here you go”. But it wasn’t what I wanted at all. It was the opposite.

How many times in your life are you spending more energy on what can go wrong? Expecting the worst and then being shown the worst.

This is part of our fight or flight function of the brain. We do this instinctively for protection.

But studies show that people who focus on the good in their life, receive more good in their life.

Which begs the question “Are they receiving more, or are they just more grateful for what they have?”

I don’t know? You tell me.

How you answer that question is exactly what you will get.

Once I started climbing myself out of the hole I was in, I was invited to join the city arts commission. Once again interacting with the community I love. Once more having an active voice for the arts.

I easily fell right back into the swing of it. And the more I got involved with the city the more I understood about getting art installed throughout the city.

I met and made friends with others doing the same. I participated in Seattle’s world-class Public Art Boot Camp.

I met my artner, a super talented graphic designer who I knew I wanted to work with immediately, Marsha Rollinger.

As we grew resources through the city, Marsha started sharing her ideas for design with me. I soon found myself playing Watson to her genius.

Within a year Marsha and I were working together to beautify our streets. Marsha created perfect designs that resonate with the 1970’s geometric colors and design so fond to our hearts.

It was around this time I started pausing in the moment to give a silent Thank you to the universe for this moment and this life.

I was living a dream.

As I continue to work as a copywriter I often get caught up in new projects or ideas leaving my art world behind.

But then moments happen like this past week. I’m out painting a mural once more. Loving the process. Loving being part of Marsha’s team. Love the reaction from our community as fences, murals, and sculptures are created around town through our efforts.

Maybe you have something like this in your life. Something you engage in that brings you so much pleasure and happiness that time seems to melt away.

I hope so.

If not, go find it. Something you can do because your heart is invested more than your pocketbook.

These are the things that make your life. The most important story you will ever tell.

Focus on what you want and happiness will find you. It is the only way to happiness. Chasing happiness will never pan out.

Ask yourself, what weaves in and out of your life in the most unexpected ways that bring joy to your heart?

Do you make time for it?

I’m not saying you should make a career out of it, but do you do it? Do you prioritize it?

What things in your life make you take a silent pause?

Can you identify those moments? And if you can, do you ever take a moment to thank the universe for showing them to you?

Or do you find yourself looking around your life and asking “how did I end up here?”

Do you catch yourself thinking and expecting the worst possible outcome and then saying “I knew it” when it happens?

If you grew up in the ’70s & 80’s you might have watched The Muppet Show! I was, and am a big fan. Kermit the Frog, the central character and host of the show is surrounded by all kinds of characters. He’s the rock. He keeps things moving and always expects the best. This makes him enjoyable and easy to rally around.

But as we age somewhere along the path of broken dreams and expectations you might start relating more to Statler and Waldorf, the old opinionated hecklers sitting in the balcony. Never participating but always with some unhelpful thing to comment on about those who are trying to do something good.

At some point you need to ask yourself if you’re a Kermit or a Statler and Waldorf.

Jim Hensen knew what he was doing. He imagined a world and made it his life’s mission to share that world with us.

What about you? What are you focusing on? What dreams would you like to share with the world?

Do you get trapped in the I’m too old, too fat, too ugly, or not smart enough crowd?

I sure have spent a fair amount of time in those tired old camps.

What do you dream your life to look like? Are you making steps to make those a reality?

What can you do today to focus more on what you want your life to be?

What can you be grateful for right now?

Your life is a hall of mirrors.

If you see it as a tragedy or a comedy then that is what will be reflected.

You can only see what and who you are.

The world outside you is a reflection of what’s going on inside you.

My guess is you have moments and situations like the one I listed above. Living your best life and then losing a part of it because your focus was in lack.

Once you realize the power you have in the daily choices you make you can evolve past those patterns, or you can be consumed by them.

You get to decide.

The more you become aware the more you will actively focus your mind toward the things in life you want. You will begin to see yourself painting that masterpiece and then one day you will be midway through that painting and realize you are living your dream.

This is the path I’m on. I’m looking to connect with other seekers who believe as I do. Please drop a line to connect. We are stronger together and if we can work collectively to focus on betterment for all, well then…

The whole boat gets raised.

Either way, keep focusing on the good you see in life and be one of the people who lives a little different through focus and gratitude.

--

--

Mary Clymer

Breathwork Coach, Pulmonaut Explorer, & Content Creator. Taking it one breath at a time. Join me at breath_mindset.com